STEPS TO REALIZING THAT RAPE IS NOT THE END OF LIFE
Before the World we are living in today, it is only women that used to face sex assort, but not in the twenty first century, both men and women are victims of rape, this is even though women are still at the greater risk of being raped than men.
Rape is the act of having sexual intercourse with someone who is not willing; it is also that act of forcing someone to have sex with you. So, in other words, it is the act of using force to attain sexual pleasure.
I know many of us have either had friends who have under gone through the painful act of rape, or are either victims by themselves, please do not sleep and be silent about it, wake up, raise your voice and make sure that tomorrow, it does not happen to someone else. I understand it is hard to speak about it because many of us are afraid of saying the wrong thing, but remember, there will be no world without mistakes, speak out, if you go wrong, then it will be for the right purpose and someone will be there always to correct you. Please everyone fight rape and fight it hard.
When someone is raped, their self esteem goes down, many react in very different ways, some will hate all men if the victim is a woman and vice versa,
others will be so hungry with every one, others will want to hide away from people, and due to the pain experience, no one will be comfortable with it.
Even if you are afraid of talking about it, or afraid of approaching the rape victim, remember that your silence solves no problem but it acts as a powerful tool for the perpetrator. Sexual violation is worldwide a crime punishable by law, and when it happens here are steps on how to go about it;
Regardless of what you fill after the act, remember with time, you will be the normal you, and life will move on as usual again.
- After rape/sexual assort, one fill so physically dirty, but no matter how dirty you fill, taking a shower should be the second option after reporting to the nearest police station- you need to report it so as to get help on how to receive medical help and so that the perpetrator may get his/her salary for the job they just did. Nobody should work and go without pay, and the salary for such a person is well defined by the law of your land.
- Seeking medical attention should be the next thing directly from the police station, remember to ask for a police officer to accompany you to the hospital since after you reported the issue, the police should begin collecting all evidence available immediately. And going to the hospital does not help the police only gather evidence but also helps you get treatment for sexually transmitted diseases.
- Remember, the police officer assigned to you now after the report you made at the police station, is you number one friend in fighting this crime, so if they ask for the cloths you were wearing during the demonic act, please give them to them.
- Remember to keep every original document that you get in the process of fighting this- apart from the medical report which is kept by the doctor, remember your documents on this act are what will lead to the end of such acts by the one who committed them to you, so to avoid the big bosses stepping on your toes and then to your head, keep the originals and let everyone else even the police keep the photocopies of the same.
- So as for you to get better in heart, remember that what you are filling, from; shame, numbness, hunger, rejection, hatred, isolation, and any other fillings, are normal and will go away with time, keep strong and know that you are not alone, since one out of every six women are at a risk of having faced sexual assort.
- Since many of the perpetrators target people who might not be financially stable, so that after the act nobody follows up, remember that in almost every part of the world today, there are non-governmental organisations and support groups that help people through this process and the financial part is their responsibility. Wake up and go seek help from such NGO’s so that they can push it on, don’t forget to carry your documents about the case.
- The assort is never your fault- since many of the victims tend to think that the rape act was their fault, keep it in mind that it was not your fault since you did not invite the perpetrator, so it is the fault of whoever committed it and this is why, he/she should never go scotch free.
- No matter how strong you think you are, remember that your strength was not on training on how to deal with sex assorts, so, please visit a councillor who will help you regain yourself trust and self drive to move on with life. If you think it is expensive to pay the councillor, remember I already told you that there are NGO’s who will always have their doors open for you.
- Let someone you love know about what you’re going through and ask how they can help, since if you keep it bottled to your heart, it will do you more damage than good.
- Taking control of things around you is now difficult after the rape, so do not fill shamed to ask for help where you fill that you need it, remember to cooperate with people helping you have the perpetrator of the act pay for his sins. This is because, not everyone helping you fill the much pain that you fill and if after awhile you don’t show concern, they might also fill that it is now ok but remember it will never be ok, until someone is stopped from assorting another person if not you again.
- There are many support groups that deal with victims of sexual assort, please join one since it will be good for you to spend time with people whom you share a problem with.
- People who try talking bad or making it look like you deserved the animosity that face you, are and should not be part of your life. Stay away from such people and make sure, what they say do not affect your progress.
- Now that you might have been hiding from people, remember that it is not very wrong too, each and every victims of any crime have their own way of dealing with it and getting out of it, so, when you begin socialising again, remember to always be in a company of sweet friends who can defend you from the shame that you might be facing.
- If you are a man who faced rape, remember that not everyone will believe in you because many of us do not believe that a man can be raped,
so please understand people and be close to those that believe you for its only them who can help.
- There is no timetable in recovering from a sexual assort, so take all the time in the world and never pressure yourself in getting well very first. There is also no right or wrong way in recovering from it, so just take advices for what people tell you might be true, and not driven by hunger.
It is very hard for anybody to fill comfortable if someone close to them was sexually assorted, please remember hunger and hatred might want to drive you to physically and emotional damage so deal with the perpetrator, the law is always the right path. I hope that my article has answered some of the questions that run through many people’s minds like: what could I do if someone raped me? What could I do if my daughter, son, grandmother, mother, girlfriend, was raped?
I know many wish that those who commit rape could die, but ask yourself this for a minute; is death enough, will they even see their own grave? To me, them being locked in a Jail is the best option, them thinking that they had freedom, looking at the jail doors everyday and wishing that they were better dead, them filling hunger just like the victim they coursed pain, them living each day remembering that they will never again get united with any of their relatives, them facing hard labour in prison and having no friends but the prison walls, them filling isolated just like they made you fill, what about in countries where castration is the punishment? They live to cry that no matter how much freedom they have after the jail term, touching any other person is the last thing they will do before their death. So, you out there, always never get physical with them so that they might not get killed in the exchange of blows and never live to pay for their crime.
They say experience is the best teacher, but I say experience is the worst teacher, since it acts, then gives you the lesson later. So, please let you not wait for any experience, learn now and act now.
LET US GET UNITED AGAINIST RAPE.
By: Kobia Koome.